Quiet solitude

University of Florida, Gainesville, FL

University of Florida, Gainesville, FL

Take a second and think about how a rainy day makes you feel?

I never get tired of staring at the different shapes a flame can make in a fire. I never get tired of listening to the sound of the waves from the ocean crashing onto the shore.I never get tired of feeling the rain in my skin. I never get tired of looking at the stars, breathing fresh air and walking barefoot on the grass.

There are some sensations that we can perceive but not define. Try it one day and you will be surprised how lovely and restorative it can be for your mind and body. Just to pause and contemplate, it can seem that nowadays we are too focused on our ego and our busy lives. We forget how nice everything is around us.

I woke up this morning,meditated for 20 minutes, had some breakfast in a quiet room and took a shower, feeling the warm water flowing slowly through my body. A new day had started. Walking outside I could hardly see two feet in front of me,a silent humid fog was covering the streets and paths. It was a mysterious and beautiful sensation. I felt like I was inside of a cloud.

Suddenly my mind began to wander and I felt that it might be dangerous to walk this early alone, and I got scared. I think I probably just found myself an excuse to stop everything I was doing and worry. I was thinking why should I go to yoga? Should I go back to sleep? I’m tired. I felt unworthiness, I wasn’t able to keep walking to my yoga class.I tried to convince myself that if I didn’t go to my yoga class today, it will not change the fact that I’m not the best yogi practitioner in the world. The anxiety was starting to take power and a place in my mind and suddenly my body.I started to think that something was wrong with me and that I couldn’t keep walking.

Furthermore, I managed to quiet my mind, ran my anxiety and got into a wonderful yoga class.I felt alive and released.I believed and I told myself that I could do it. I saw the solitude of the park with another eyes, I felt like a warrior that just won the battle of the day. A day full of new options that I decided to take.

For me the anxiety was real.Everything that happened in that moment of doubt,fear and stress was completely real for me. Then I found a sacred place inside of me, a place where I could be free of my mind, and just be. I breathed a couple of times and I contemplated the quiet solitude of the place surrounding me. I found that being alone makes you stronger and it also gives you time to meet with yourself and accept the way you feel at the particularly moment in your life.

As a well-known writer and psychologist describes “recognizing the beliefs and fears that sustain the trance of unworthiness is the beginning of freedom, Tara Branch”.

Brach also reminds us in her book “Radical Acceptance” that no matter how wounded we are,we can choose to belong to life. Radical Acceptance is an invitation to heal our pain by accepting your heart.

University of Florida, Gainesville, FL

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